Temporary contact’s forever or just for a day.

You meet a lot of people on the road and I reasontly read a blog about temporary contacts, this blog really hit home for me and I felt like I couldn’t say it better my self. When you have travelled for 5 years its hard to make permanent friends. Do not get me wrong I have lots of friend who I love deeply and that I have shared so many good times, adventure and near death experiences. These people will forever be in my heart but I am not foolish I know that only a minimal few will enter my life again. For some time I let this thought get to me I hated the fact that every time I get close to someone they disappear from my life and start their next adventure leaving me behind. It wasn’t until a few days after reading the blog that something accrued to me. Maybe these temporary contacts are not a bad thing, maybe letting someone close for just a few days, sharing things with a complete stranger who suddenly becomes your best friend over a glass of rum on an island. That stranger that just go on the boat with you becomes a companion, that girl checking in before you is has now shared a one in a life time experience with you. Yes saying goodbye still fills me with sadness but the memory’s I have of them fill me with happiness that could last a lifetime. 
Iv just returned from country number 41the Philippines where I am happy to say I made many temporary contacts. The guy that encouraged me to ride a motor bike and face my fears. The boys I travelled with for 6 days sharing cocktails, buses beds and more. The solo travellers that came together on a bus and found we were all in the same room. The Americans who faced the sun, rain and near death with me. There are so many more I couldn’t begin to list them.
So yes I am filled with the same questions, do they think of me to? Will they miss me? Will I see them again?. Am I the only one that fees lonely being by my self but meeting so many groups. 
I loved travelling with groups is something I have not done much of or at least had not thought about it. I seem to struggle with making long term friends I think I need my own space far to much, I cant take other peoples mood swing when im in a happy place and I like the freedom of choosing my own path. But the stress of making a decision gets to me in ways nothing else can. Where do I go next? Will I have the money for what I want? Will I make friends? Will I like it?. So many questions so many choices sometimes I want to scream! its hard to think with so many thoughts in my head. It makes me relieved when I find a group that have similar plans to me. People that make me relax and just go with the flow because that is when im happy, that is when I relax and just enjoy the ride. I wish I could be like that all the time but life can get a bit to much, people change their plans or I go back to mine and we say good bye. I miss them all the temporary contacts from over the last 5 years, the friends still on the road and the friends back at home. One thing has changed for me in the last few weeks instead of feeling alone and left behind something has clicked I am not left behind I am just on the next part of my journey. My next step will contain more temporary contacts more people to get to know but with each one I grow and learn and with each one I leave with something from me. Each accidental meeting, each deep conversation, each night under the same sky. They all change you and leave their mark the question is how do you interpret that mark. As a sadness that you are again alone even though its a choice to be or do you see it as a gift from what ever powers that be. 
To all my temporary contacts I am happy to call you my friends.

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